Give This Up to Attract Soulmate Love

by Dr. Lara Fernandez on January 15, 2013

Over the next few weeks, I’ll be writing about the 4 most important things to let go of in 2013 in order to become a true attractor for love this year. I started last week’s article with the first thing to release and let go of.

As an independently-minded woman who’s raising an independently-minded daughter, I am all for self-sufficiency and for women being fully capable of providing for themselves and living their best lives on their own so they don’t cling to a man who’s unhealthy for them, thinking that they need to stay with him to be able to pay the bills or maintain a certain persona with their neighbors.

I have a friend in her early 70’s who told me about her pretty tragic life in her 20’s and 30’s. She was in an abusive relationship with her husband, where he beat her within an inch of her life many a time. Her young children saw her get beat up over and over again (imagine the traumatic memories for them!), and it wasn’t until he beat her up while she was pregnant with their child that she realized that she needed to kick him out for good. Which she did. But not before years of physical and emotional abuse had affected her and her children who had to witness those episodes.

When she told me this story, I asked her, “Why? Why did you stay with him? Why didn’t you feel that you were able to just pack up and leave the very first time he hit you??”

She had a lot to say about why… and the bottom line was that she didn’t think she would be able to keep a roof over her head if she didn’t stay with him. She couldn’t see how she would be able to make it without his financial contribution to the household.

Ugh! This is an intelligent, educated woman! And this is what she was thinking! My heart hurts for her and for the helplessness she must have felt during that time.

My friend has since (for the last 40+ years) eschewed relationships and has decided that she was better off alone for the rest of her life. Now, she certainly IS better off alone than in an abusive relationship… but there are other options for relationships then either you’re alone… or you’re getting beaten up, right? There’s a lot of other choices between these two extremes.

So, my story about my friend leads me to the 2nd thing to let go of in 2013:
the all-or-nothing attitude of “I don’t need a man!” (aka “either-or” thinking).

You are right. You DON’T need a man. You are perfectly capable of providing for yourself, living your life surrounded by your loving family and friends, and building a fulfilling career or business. BUT, you read this blog for a reason. There’s SOMETHING inside of you that WANTS to be with the RIGHT man for you. A Quality Man.

And that something has kept you coming back to read my articles, that something has had you join us in one of our telecourses or home learning courses, or watch one of our popular video teaching series’ or want to learn with us live at our Love Breakthrough Weekend course. And that something is what’s going to help you become the woman who is emotionally and spiritually mature and ready, finally really ready, to attract the soulmate of your dreams.

The attitude of “I don’t need no man!!” doesn’t serve your dreams, girlfriend (neither does the attitude of “I can’t be alone… I’ll be miserable by myself”… but that’s an article for another day).

Start thinking “both” thinking. “Both” thinking is what people who attract the life of their dreams do. Instead of either-or… they think both. What it really translates to is abundance and enough and prosperity thinking. When you think “either I can be with a man and get hurt, be disrespected, or beaten…. OR I can be alone and happy”…. that’s lack and limitation and “not enough” thinking. That’s a scarcity mindset and I’ll bet you are experiencing scarcity in your life at LEAST in one area, if not more than one.

So let go of either-or thinking and start to embrace abundance, prosperity and ENOUGH in your life. Here’s a great affirmation that I recommend you write on a post-it note and look at it every morning and every evening on your bathroom mirror and say it out loud 3 times. Seriously. Do this every day for 60 days. Watch the shifts occur in your life.

“I am an unlimited being accepting from an unlimited source in an unlimited way

Here’s to you… experiencing more blessings, more good in your life in 2013. It’s time, isn’t it? It’s YOUR time, so get ready to receive!

What are you going to DO after reading this article to help you eliminate or dramatically lessen the “either-or” thinking? Please share in the comments below. I love to hear from you and I do my best to respond to every comment.

And join me next week, as I reveal the 3rd thing to let go off to attract soulmate love into your life this year.


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