Soulmate Love Is Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be

by Dr. Lara Fernandez on May 21, 2013

Johnny and I have been together for almost 13 years now and we have so many women come up to us in our workshops, or on our telecourses and ask us questions like:

soulmate rings Soulmate Love Is Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be~ Do you two ever fight? I was told that if it’s a REAL soulmate relationship, that you will never argue.

~ Is being in this relationship as good as you make it sound?

~ How do you keep your love alive?

And these questions tell us a LOT about what the mass consciousness is around relationships. We see that there’s a sense of perfectionism around what soulmate love REALLY is. That if you disagree and even if you argue, that it couldn’t be true love. We also see a lot of the opposite, a belief that relationships just COULDN’T be as wonderful as Johnny and I are saying.

But here’s the TRUTH:

Soulmate Love is not it’s all cracked up to be. Let me tell you the REAL DEAL.

You see, soulmate love is BETTER! Words simply are not adequate to explain how AMAZING it is. How so?

~ Waking up with the man who loves and adores me and expresses it to me fully is awesome.

~ When the tough times happen in life (and they do happen), knowing that he’s got my back no matter what is so grounding.

~ When we disagree about something and even argue about it (YES, we DO argue sometimes), we are committed to each other anyway. We love each other through the discomfort of those moments.

~ Knowing that we are both committed to our relationship as a sacred and spiritual responsibility to ourselves, our child, our community and to our higher power is the best feeling in the world. Our relationship is more than just about us. It’s a cherished agreement and understanding that we have with one another.

~ Seeing the world through each other’s eyes with the agreement that we are a TEAM. Team Fernandez. We stick together. Feels so so good!

~ Knowing that we don’t have to be “perfect” (whatever that means, and not that it exists anyway), and that we love each other, no-matter-what helps us each feel safe with one another. And that safety is our sanctuary.

couple holding hands 290 Soulmate Love Is Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be And if you’re wondering how we keep our love alive… well, we don’t have to “keep” it alive, like some person that’s in a coma needing life support. Our love exists and keeps growing because of the people we became BEFORE we met each other and from there, we attracted the RIGHT person for us.

Because attracting the right person wasn’t “the finish line” – it was the beginning of an incredible new chapter of our lives, and we haven’t stopped learning, growing, expanding, being grateful, and cherishing ourselves, each other, our daughter, and our community, and on and on…

So what do YOU want in your relationship? When you attract your soulmate, what do you want it to be like? Tell me below in the comments section. Share your dream! I love to read your comments and I try my best to answer every one.

Until next week… icon wink Soulmate Love Is Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be

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“Don’t Chase the Paper, Chase the Dream”

by Dr. Lara Fernandez on May 14, 2013

“Don’t chase the paper, chase the dream”
- P.Diddy (yes, I said P.Diddy)

Here’s my dream: to inspire spiritual, single women to step into their power, speak their truth and live the life of their dreams with their soulmate by their side.

ID 10057522 “Don’t Chase the Paper, Chase the Dream” WHY do you want to find your soulmate? Why do you want to live the life of your dreams? What’s YOUR dream? Are you chasing the “paper” (just the guy, the money, the hot body, the next job promotion) or are you going for fulfillment, joy, peace, self-love… the feelings your dreams, when realized, will actually provide you?

If you want to magnetize your dreams to you, you must keep your big WHY clear in your head. In the early stages of creating your dream life, there won’t always be clear evidence that your idea is a good one, or that this is the right time to go for it.

During this time, what is essential is that you believe in your vision. At the very least, you need to adopt beliefs that will support you in moving from where you are to where you want to be. In a survey of over 250 family physicians from across the country, 99% said they thought a patient’s belief could enhance and aid in their recovery process. To say it plainly, having a strong belief system is more than just an airy-fairy, New Age idea. Having a strong belief system is essential.

Since our attitudes and beliefs determine the choices and the decisions we make, your beliefs will either boost you or betray you. And please keep this in mind: your beliefs are never neutral. They either move you forward or hold you back. If you dream of attracting your true love to you, but don’t believe it’s possible, watch how quickly you’ll prove yourself right, over and over again! But if you take this same dream -to find your soulmate- and ACT as though you believe in it, you will take different actions that, if you are open and persistent, will ultimately end up in your soulmate being by your side.

There are three main limiting beliefs that we as humans tend to be born with or acquire over time. These are important to recognize when (or if) you see them showing up in your life.

Limiting Belief #1: Inadequacy. “I’m not ____(fill in the blank) enough.” I’m not good enough, smart enough, fast enough, rich enough, thin enough, young enough, old enough, etc.

Limiting Belief #2: Scarcity. “There’s not enough _______(fill in the blank) to go around.” Not enough time, money, good men to go around…it’s all just scarcity thinking.

Limiting Belief #3: Trust. “I don’t trust you, me, the timing, God, or _____” (fill in the blank). Without having trust in someone or something outside of yourself you’ll be putting so much pressure on yourself, you’ll never change your fortunes in love. Learn from and trust others, and have faith beyond that…there’s more going on than you can see, more than you can know, more than meets the eye.

Do you hear any of these lines playing in your head? If so, please know that a belief is really only a habitual thought you keep thinking that either empowers you or impedes you.

If your habitual thoughts (aka beliefs) are holding you back from taking action toward your soulmate and the life of your dreams, here’s what to do.

Replace your thoughts with these:

1. I deserve _____ (soulmate love, financial prosperity, a fit and healthy body, fill in the blank).

LBN may 14th “Don’t Chase the Paper, Chase the Dream” 2. There’s plenty of _______ (good men, money, great jobs) to go around. There is enough of everything.

3. I trust that there’s a reason for everything and that God/Spirit/The Universe has my back (even if I don’t like how things look right now).

I recommend that you take 5 minutes and write these positive new beliefs on sticky notes and put them all over your house, your car, or even at your desk at work. Remember, if you don’t trust and do something different, life can hand you opportunities to have what you say you really, really want and you will miss them.

Here’s to living your dreams!

So, do any of the limiting beliefs above sound like you? If so, what are you doing to shift those beliefs? Please share in the comments section below. I love to hear from you and I do my best to respond to every comment.

Have a blessed week as you go for your dreams!

“A belief is really only a habitual thought you keep thinking that either empowers you or impedes you.”
– Lara Fernandez

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